Guest Hamish, a 47-year-old biotechnology graduate from Auckland, has shared his deeply personal journey of battling addiction, depression, and grief. Sharing his story with Hamish Williams and Psychotherapist Kyle MacDonald on The Nutters Club, he sheds light on the complexities of mental health and the transformative power of vulnerability, community, and self-reflection.

Born in Hong Kong and raised in West Auckland, Hamish excelled academically and professionally, earning a degree in biotechnology from the University of Auckland. ​However, beneath the surface of his outward success, he struggled with unresolved grief following the death of his mother at age 20. ​Hamish revealed that he never processed this loss, which contributed to years of depression and addictive behaviors, including pornography and drug use. ​

Hamish’s addiction reached a breaking point when his wife discovered his continued use of pornography just before the birth of their first child. ​This revelation led to marriage counseling, individual therapy, and participation in a 12-step program, which he credits as life-changing. ​“I had never experienced an environment where I could say anything, share anything, and be emotional without judgment,” he said. ​The program helped him develop true friendships and embrace vulnerability, which he now sees as a cornerstone of his recovery. ​

Despite his struggles, Hamish has found purpose in sharing his experiences to help others. ​He openly discusses his mental health challenges on platforms like LinkedIn and has supported individuals in crisis, including a colleague contemplating suicide. ​“If I can help even one person, then what I’ve been through isn’t all for nothing,” he said. ​

Hamish’s recovery has been marked by significant milestones, including a recent 90-day stint in rehab, his third attempt at overcoming drug addiction. ​He now focuses on building healthy habits, such as regular exercise, therapy, journaling, and spending time with his children. He also emphasizes the importance of sitting with emotions and finding meaning in life, drawing inspiration from Viktor Frankl’s book Man’s Search for Meaning. ​

While Hamish acknowledges that recovery is a lifelong process, he is beginning to rediscover a passion for life. ​ “I’m starting to develop a purpose again,” he shared. ​ His story serves as a powerful reminder that mental health challenges do not discriminate and that vulnerability and connection can pave the way to healing. That even in the darkest moments, there is always hope.